Showing posts from September, 2005

The Dumbest Question Ever

Australians are notorious for looking for the "Australian connection" in anything. Bill Bryson has supposited that this is because the rest of the world doesn't pay attention to us, so we have to pay attention to ourselves. But it does reach ridiculous proportions. For example, a news bulletin will never report on any disaster that takes place overseas without reporting whether there were or weren't any Australians involved. Ditto when any overseas celebrity dies (such as, Don Adams a.k.a Maxwell Smart, may he R.I.P.), the media never fail to mention any trips they made to Australia, work they may have done here, etc. Well, this morning on the Today show, the all-time level of credulity was reached. Richard Wilkins , whom I've never much cared for, was interviewing the director Cameron Crowe , discussing the release of his new film. Crowe mentioned the fact that Almost Famous did better box office in Australia than in any other country. Wilkins said to Crowe: &

Another Day, Another Dollar...

Which is pretty much all I'm left with from my pay packet after taxes, bills and bus fares. But I shouldn't complain too much about my job. After all, today there's a reflexologist coming in to the office, and I can enjoy a reflexology appointment, not only that I don't have to pay for, but I'm actually getting paid whilst I receive it. How many people can say that? I'd rather it was a neck massage though, I've been having alot of problems with my neck and back lately (oh, the perils of age!) It was just a sedate weekend, I met Boof and Funky in town and we planned to go to the markets, but once we got there we were too tired to bother looking. They asked me did I want to go to dinner that night, but I couldn't really afford it, as I'd splurged on the Red Dwarf series one DVD, finally! I do like the later series better, but I decided to start at the beginning and collect the whole set. Other than watching that, and a lot of football, it wasn't a

Mark Latham, You Bloody Idiot!

Before I start this post, let me just say I'm on the record here as having been a staunch Latham supporter in the past. Latham, mid-2004 That's all over now. Shall we proceed... Well, Mark Latham, former leader of the Federal Labor party who resigned in January, four months after losing the election, has published his diaries, basically spewing venom at Labor, the Liberals, the Federal Press Gallery, and everyone else. Normally for a story like this, I'd have links so you could read all this yourselves, but I must say, this has been one of the hardest stories to Google that I've ever done. Links are broken or missing (for example, the official Pariliament house website's link titled "Member for Werriwa gives you this ) , and where active, are often to subscription-only newspaper services. Now, I haven't read the book yet. No one has; it isn't released until Wednesday, and excerpts have been tightly controlled. But I have read his From The Suburbs , and

Celebrating The Chaser

On the Chaser forum , there's a thread for people to suggest their own items for the newsbar. Here, in no particular order, is a selection of my favourites (in order to get the full experience, may I humbly suggest you turn your head sideways and scroll down the page to read them): Unfunny Chaser headline lifted from The Onion Channel 9 defies Ptolemy, Copernicus: Declares Eddie centre of universe Australian Idol Reject Finalist leaves with dignity Andrew Bolt fired for objective journalism, goes quietly. Kerry O'Brien nails politician with absurd hypothetical Mid-morning news presenter listens to guest, asks unprepared question Lateline interview finishes without 'running out of time' Sensitive new age male student secretly downloads Paris Hilton sex video Glen Robbins: ‘I am ready to win a gold Logie’ Viewer still confused over Mick Molloy’s digs at Steve Vizard on The Late Show Bob Ellis predicts Kim Beazley victory, still not joking Irony of phrase 'Two Party Pr

Howard's Telstra Moment

As you are probably aware, if you're reading this in Australia, the main political story in the news at the moment is Telstra; the government wants to sell its remaining 51% share in the company, but are having problems, because the new board of directors , headed by Sol Trulijo, are basically coming out and saying that the telco is up a long creek with no paddle, riddled with problems. Apparently John Howard, our honourable PM, has been aware of these issues since August 11 , but it's only now being revealed. So last night, I switched on The 7:30 Report , expecting that there would be an interview with lil' Johnnie. And there was. But at first, the screen was frozen on the show's logo, and a voiceover came on saying, "We wish to advise that we are having transmission difficulties, we will resume the program as soon as possible." Then there were muted noises and muffled talking in the background...and then clear as a bell, you could hear John Howard's dist

Spring, Where A Young Man's Fancy Turns Lightly To Thoughts Of The Cricket

I'm sure it won't come as much of a surprise to any of you that I'm not a cricket fan. The Irish tend not to be fans of the sport. But as I see it, cricket has little to recommend it. At least if you hate the football, it's over in two hours. Cricket can go on for five days and at the end, there still can be no winner. People have tried to enlighten me as to cricket's supposed charms, but with little success. I have a friend who is, in all other respects, a sensible and highly intelligent man, but is nonetheless enthusiastic about cricket, who spent a patient two hours last summer attempting to explain the cricket to me whilst some test or other was on. Sadly, I was paying very little attention to what he said, because all the time he was talking, all I could do was stare at the TV and think, "Darren Lehman's got bosoms!" (I must grow up. There's a TV commercial for a door sales company that runs regularly around here, and I get the giggles every t